Have you ever felt like you were in the middle of a big ‘ole mess? Like there was no way to get out of it?

As I was going through a bible study, I came across the story of Hezekiah and Sennacherib. (2 Chronicles 31-32). In case you’re not familiar with this study, let me get you to speed. Hezekiah is king of Judah and has a heart for God. He has implemented reforms in the kingdom and is working to make Judah the kingdom God wants it to be. Enter Sennacherib. He is king of Assyria, one of the most powerful empires in the world at this time. Sennacherib wants to invade and capture Judah. However, Hezekiah hears about it ahead of time and begins preparations in Jerusalem for the impending attack. He cuts off the streams flowing outside the city because he does not want the Assyrians to benefit from them. He repairs the broken walls and towers of Jerusalem, and even builds a new one. He appoints military officers to the people, and assembles them together for a public address. In this address he lets the people know what is coming for them, and he also reminds them of who is truly taking care of them, God, not Hezekiah.

I am familiar with this story, but this time God opened my eyes to something new. If you read the account again you’ll notice a few things.

• The impending attack was not a surprise. Hezekiah recognized the warning signs.
• He cut off the streams which would feed the enemy.
• He rebuilt his defenses and added some more.
• He appointed leaders for his people to go to.
• He gathered his people together.
• He told them what was coming.
• He reminded them of who was taking care of them

Shouldn’t we use this same method when the enemy attacks us today? Think about it. If you break it down it makes perfect sense.

First, we have to be in a right relationship with God, this includes talking to Him and listening for His answers. Then once we recognize the signs we need to fortify ourselves. How can we do that? Worship him with music and song. Read our Bibles. Pray.

Second, we need to find the things in our lives that feed the enemy and his attacks to cut them off completely.

Third, find our broken defenses and rebuild them. How do we do this?  We need to pray and ask God to reveal those things to us. And then we need to work on them.

Fourth, he appointed leaders for the people to answer to.  We need people we can go to who are wise and discerning. People you know have a close relationship with God. In short, we need a mentor to help guide us. If you don’t have one, pray God would show you who He would have fill that role for you, and reveal it in His time.

Fifth, he assembled the people together. We were made for fellowship. Don’t forget that. God did not intend for us to be alone. Find some Christ followers somewhere and join with them.

Sixth, Hezekiah was honest with the people and told them what was coming. God will always be honest with us. He can not lie.

Lastly, he reminded the people of who they were, God’s Chosen People. He reminded them of who they ultimately put their faith in, the God of the universe, Jehovah. He is the only one who can and will protect us.

Remember, the attacks are going to come. You can’t live in this world and be a part of Him without them. He has called us out. We are to be a peculiar people. How can that effectively be shown if we don’t meet adversity? But He will show us. He will provide a way for us to stand up under it. He will.

While attending a bible study we were asked to take an index card and right down our prayer request for the evening.  It’s funny with all of the things we have to pray about my request has been the same for months.  So this is what I wrote:

“Lord your way is the only way, my way is of the flesh.  I want to move in your way.  Show me, oh Lord, the right way (Your way)  that I may not fail you.  I want to hear your voice.”

After everyone  wrote down their request we laid our hands on each one and prayed for the answers.  When we were finished we all grabbed our individual request and took them home.

I have been deeply seeking God for direction.  Little by little the Lord has answered. I think we all just want God to show up and say “Okay, here it is…”  But if we truly look deep enough the answer is there.

In my morning devotion today I was reading in Proverbs.  There are 31 Proverbs, one for each day of the month.  I was on Proverbs 16.  Verse 3 says “Commit your works to the Lord, And your thoughts will be established.”

My works…hmm what are my works?  It’s whatever I put my hands to, my gifts to, or my talents. The question is do I first commit them to my Lord?  That was the key!  God was answering my prayers.  The Holy Spirit is my guide. His word is a lamp unto my feet.  I must commit my works to God.

My thoughts have been a tangled mess.  I couldn’t separate my plan from His plan in my life. His word says if I commit my works to Him, then and only then, will my thoughts be established.  I taught not long ago about God’s word being established in our lives.  This means that His word would be set up over a period of time-permanently.
So, now the picture seems to be coming together for me.  I first commit my works to the Lord, and then my thoughts shall be established!  Praise the Lord for all of His goodness and Grace!
Brandie

During our retreat at The Cove this past weekend God amazed me yet again. We talked about “Footprints Wanted” on Friday night. On Saturday the women heard about “Ashes to Beauty” and then that night we talked about “Let my Word be established”.  As I sat through all of these sessions I was brought to the realization of how much God desires for me. He wants me to have a life I can only dream of. He wants more for me, than I want for myself. But, and there is a big one. It is going to cost something. It is going to take service, obedience, humility, mercy, grace and love. As those things begin to work in my life more, God’s promises and blessings will be brought forth.

So many times we view Christian service as what we can and will do for God. That is completely wrong. Christian service is about allowing God to work through and in our lives. He wants our footprints. He wants us to go. He wants us to follow. How long will we continue to sit mulling over past hurts and wallowing in fear?

God strengthen me for this day. Show me your desire for me today. Help me be obedient to you. Guide me and direct me. Let my life be a sign pointing to you, Lord. I pray no one see me, just the work of Your hands.

I was talking to my husband about going to a ministry event today. I told him I felt so different going to this one than I have to ones in the past. In the last few months I have faced depression, problems with my kids, bitterness and hurt, and dealt with past demons I never thought I would see again. Through it all I can see how God is using it to change me into someone He can use, someone who will follow Him instead of trying to lead Him. That one point is the key I think. A few weeks ago, my pastor made the point that at some point in your walk with Jesus you reach a point where you have to decide. You have to choose. Are you going to continue trying to lead for God, or are you going to follow God?

I told my husband I think I am at that point in my life. Old hurts are healing. God is revealing Himself to me in little ways each day. It is up to me to make time for Him, and look for Him. I know I have pulled back in some areas, but I know God can still use me. I’ve begun to realize I can not do things the way I want to, and have the results I desire. I can’t keep leading the way.

For so long I prayed for boldness because I had none. I got too much, and went to prideful and uncompassionate on many levels. God has taken me, and pulled me back. He’s begun showing me the path of destruction I was headed down. He is good though. He has stopped me, and is beginning to pick up the pieces, and put me back together so I can accomplish His desires.

So today I am going to an event where there are going to be people dealing with major issues and trying to just keep their heads above water right now. I will pray with any who want me to pray, but this time I will not pray as if I have the answers and they just need to get on board. This time, I will pray as one just as broken and needing God just as much, a fellow traveler down the road so to speak.

I keep hearing this phrase lately- broken and poured out. Maybe it is what is happening with my soul. I don’t know. I do know whatever may come, God is the only one who can do what needs to be done. I am only a part of it, but I can do nothing without Him, all of Him.

I hear the verse: “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” so much. When I’ve said this most of the time I’ve really meant, “I’ve made up my mind what I am going to do, and God will help me do it.” That’s not what I think it means anymore. Now it means, “Without Christ guiding me and strengthening me I can do nothing.”  I hope you see the difference, and I hope you see the difference in me.

“If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.”- Matthew 16:24

I’m at a loss.

This is where the rubber meets the road.

I’ve been tossing so many ideas around in my head lately. Thinking about what the “right” thing to do is in certain situations, and fighting with what I “want” to do instead. As I’ve been listening to my pastor’s sermons lately I’ve been really convicted over things in my life. I have come to realize how little I thought I knew. I’ve been faced with  looking in the mirror at a person I hardly know anymore. I’ve been challenged to put up or shut up when it comes to following Christ, and my mind is warring against itself.

Every morning for the last three weeks I have woke up and thought, “Today is going to be different.” But so far, I’ve had three weeks of the same ole’ same ole’. In my mind I see myself getting my house in order. I see the kids, not fighting me so much. I see me getting back studying my Bible and spending time in prayer. Instead as the day winds down, I look back on a messy house, and grumpy kids, no time spent studying or praying, and once again I feel like a failure.

What is going on? Why is it so hard lately? I feel like I am in a battle in my mind 24/7. Last night was the first night I have gotten a decent nights sleep in almost a month, and even then I still had crazy dreams. It’s like I’m too exhausted to care about anything anymore. Yet, at the same time, things are making me more anxious than ever. I just don’t know what to do.

I did get some time yesterday to finally listen to my pastor’s sermon from this past Sunday, and I was faced with a hard truth. Maybe it is one of the reasons I have been struggling so much.

He said there are certain lines a follower of Christ can cross in his walk with Christ.

1. You have to realize you need Jesus. He is your Savior.
2. You want to follow Jesus as long as it is comfortable. (Ouch.)
3. You reach the point you are willing to stop leading for Him, and you lay down your life to follow Him.

If I was truthful, I would say I am stuck on #2. Whenever things get uncomfortable, I start questioning God. I start thinking maybe He is waiting on me to make everything alright. Which leads into the first part of #3. I seem to only want to lead for Him. I’m not so good at following when I don’t know what’s going to happen.

In John 21:22 Jesus is talking to Peter and says:

If I will that he (John) tarry til I come, what is that to thee? follow thou me.

So many times I’m just like Peter. I want to know the outcome of what God is calling me toward before I ever undertake it. I also want to know I am not alone. I want to know what others are doing, and I want to make sure if I am having to sacrifice, then others are too. But Jesus doesn’t call us to be like that. After all, He basically tells Peter, “What’s it to you if John lives forever? I told you what I want you to do.” He’s telling us to trust Him when we can’t see the next step. (Exactly where I am right now.)  He’s telling us to travel the narrow road. He’s telling us to give up everything and follow Him. He’s calling us to a place we can not get to on our own. He’s calling us into His presence.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer once said:

When Christ calls a man, He bids him, Come and die.

Maybe that is what these last few weeks have been for me, a reawakening in my soul and a dying of my fleshly desires. Maybe all these struggles have been to show me I am nothing without Christ. Maybe He is calling me to let go of bondages and die to my sinfulness.

Galatians 2:20:

I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.

Maybe this time I am going through is like a refining fire. Maybe He is burning the dross off. Maybe I will be more like Him when all of this is done. I pray so. Right now, I just want to get through this. The old song “Trust and Obey” comes to mind.

“Trust and obey, for there’s no other way, to be happy in Jesus, but to trust and obey.”

Like I said, where the rubber meets the road…

I think going to church this past Sunday messed me up.  Well, actually the last two Sundays, but this past one has been harder for me. I can’t get the disciple Peter out of my mind. Our pastor, Chris, focused on a switch in Peter’s life, one where he went from feeling remorse and guilt to having true repentance and being able to move on.

I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I’ve felt so much guilt, shame, frustration, you name it, over things in my life, and I’ve just never been able to let them go. Last Friday when everything hit the fan with one of my sons I began to realize I have to give everything to God. I can’t keep trying to fix things on my own. Then Sunday Chris talked about the difference between Judas and Peter. He made the comment, “Yeah, Judas was filled with guilt and grief over what he had done, and he decided he had to fix it himself, again. So he hung himself.  Some of you out there feel extremely guilty over things in your past and you’re trying to fix it on your own. How’s that working out for ya?” Ouch.

The difference is remorse versus repentance.

It all started to click a little at a time, and in fact I am still putting pieces together. But I began to realize I’ve been very remorseful of a lot of things. But, I haven’t truly given it to God and said only you can do this. I’ve haven’t experienced true repentance for a lot of things.

Pride is a horrible thing. There is a reason it was the first sin in heaven. I’ve always been quick to point out pride in others, and quick to admit I fall victim to it myself. But I’ve never done what was necessary to begin slaying the beast. I’ve never handed the sword over to the only one who can kill it. I’ve continually insisted on trying to poke at it myself. Now I know, I was never meant to slay this dragon. It is something only God can do. So in order to kill it, I have to let another fight it. I just have to be willing to do whatever God tells me to.

To live is self, to die is gain. I have to give up wanting things my way, and getting upset when they don’t turn out that way. Thank God, He knows where I am at and loves me anyway. Thank God, He is willing to meet me where I am. Thank God, He is willing to remind me of my purpose. Thank God, as much as I screw things up, He forgives me.

He is here right beside me willing to lead me places I have never dared dream. All I have to do is trust Him. I know that. Now comes the hard part…doing it.

I’ve been thinking about a devotional I received from Charles Stanley the other day. It talked about the Israelites when they sent spies into the promised land. He talked about how Caleb and Joshua were the only ones who said God would give them the land.

As I was reading I started thinking about it. They were the generation which saw the 10 plagues fall on Egypt. They witnessed the parting of the Red Sea. They saw water come from a rock. They were fed manna from heaven. But none of that mattered when they looked at the Promised Land, and listened to the spies report.

All they heard and saw were the things they couldn’t overcome by themselves. They didn’t even consider they were in the middle of a miracle while they were doubting God himself. I mean, think about it. The only way these people ate each day was by God’s miraculous provision of manna. It had fallen that day, but they didn’t even consider it. They didn’t consider it because they had begun taking the miracle for granted.

Aren’t we just as guilty of doing similar things today?

What’s the problem you are facing right now? Does it seem like you will never get over your past? Are you continually facing closing doors in job situations? Are family problems overwhelming?

Now think about it. What miracles from God are you taking for granted?  Look at what God has provided for you. Look who He has put around you (or in some cases who He has removed from you).

He has placed you here for a reason. You have to depend on Him. God had given the Promised Land to the Israelites, but they had to take it. Just because God has promised us something, doesn’t mean it is going to be easy. It almost always isn’t. But it is worth the fight. It is worth sacrificing what you want for what He wants.

Rom. 8:28 says:

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

Now listen to God. Be obedient to what He says. Go where He tells you, and claim your Promised Land.

1 Thessalonians 1:6 says:

And ye became followers of us, and of the Lord, having received the word in much affliction, with joy of the Holy Ghost. (KJV)

As I was reading this morning, this verse popped out at me.  Affliction and joy. Two words which should have absolutely nothing in common.

According to Strong’s Concordance the original Greek word for affliction in this case is thlipsis which means pressure- afflicted, anguish, burdened, persecution, tribulation, trouble.

Joy comes from the word chara meaning gladness x greatly (x be exceeding) joy (-ful, -fully, fulness, -ous).

How can someone possibly have joy while going through tribulations and anguish?

This past year I have witnessed this verse lived out in my own life, and in the lives of those around me. And to be honest, there were times I was watching my close friends as they went through one particularly difficult period, and I thought if this is what it costs to get close to you Lord, I don’t know if I want it. But then God allowed me to see the work He was accomplishing in them, and I knew it was worth it.  Now those friends will be the first to tell you, “We went through the fire, and we count it as joy. God worked in our lives in a way that we never could have foreseen!”

As His church and His people, we are going to go through times of testing and trouble. God allows these things to happen in our lives to grow us and test our foundation. It is not something I particularly enjoy, but it is as necessary to our growth as the food we eat. We have to know where we stand, and be willing to sacrifice for it. We have to know with everything in us, that Jesus will carry us through. The only way to know that is to experience it for ourselves.

So no matter what the problems you face. No matter if everything in your world has turned upside down. Hold on to the joy of the Holy Ghost in your life. When you face difficult times, know He is with  you.  Do as Ephesians 6 says, and put on the whole armor of God, and stand. He will not falter. He will give you joy and peace when nothing in this world can. He will…

1 Kings 22:34 

Now a certain man drew a bow at random, and struck the king of Israel between the joints of his armor.  So he said to the driver of his chariot, “Turn around and take me out of the battle, for I am wounded.”

 The first thing I notice in this verse is “a certain man drew a bow at random”, not aiming to hit the king but to hit whatever man was placed in the path of the arrow.  The King had been warned Verse 17-28 that he would fall.  He placed himself in the line of fire.  The prophesy was very clear of the outcome verse 17 Micaiah said “I saw all Israel scattered on the mountains, as sheep that have no shepherd.”  But Ahab refused to listen to the prophesy.

We may not have a prophet standing in front of us at every turn, but we have the Spirit of our Lord dwelling in each of us.  We must be decerning with our decisions.  We are quick to blame the enemy, but maybe we need to step back and see where we have placed ourselves in the line of fire.

Let’s look at the history of Ahab.  He married Jezebel, and provoked the Lord to anger more than any of Israel’s kings. He surrendered to the influences of idolatry by constructing a temple for Baal (1 Kings 16:32)  But also we see that he frequently consulted with God’s prophets (1 Kings 20:13-14,22,28)  But the influence of Jezebel in his life overshadowed any influence the prophets of the Lord had in his life.  He has become a prime example of  God’s people.  We stand wounded from the battle because of the decisions, because of the  influences in our lives. 

God’s is looking for a remnant who is ready to fight the good fight.  The battle will come…and you will be wounded……but never turn around and come out of the battle. God has equipped you to persevere.

Deuteronomy 4:9

Take heed to yourself and diligently keep yourself lest you forget the things your eyes have seen, and lest they depart from your heart all the days of your life. And teach them to your children and your grandchildren.

In this world filled with video games, TV, ipods, and cell phones our children have been set up with a broad sort of idols in their young lives. I was taught a valuable lesson today from my ten year old son. I questioned him on how long he played video games vs reading his bible. He was honest and said I never read my bible except on Sunday’s. I asked him was our God just a Sunday God or was He a everyday God? He slowly and quietly answered “He’s an everyday God.” I had to ask myself the same question, my answer of course was the same. He’s a God of everyday.

In this verse Moses is commanding the children of Israel to follow the statues of the Lord. The instructions are “heed (pay close attention) to yourself, diligently ( constantly ) keep yourself so you won’t forget what you have seen (learned). What a warning! We must pay close attention to what our flesh is doing. Constantly -because the enemy can slip in and before you know it we aren’t reading our word like we used to, or worshiping in truth. Consumed with the idols of this world. Busy Bees are what we will become. Working for the Lord, not with the Lord. There is a difference by the way. When we work for the Lord we are doing in our selves —-hint—-you will become tired quickly. When you are working with the Lord you are doing it through him not yourselves—–hint—–this produces joy and hunger for more.

So my question for you is “Is your God just a Sunday God or is He an everyday God?”

Brandie